I find myself always needing to explain our family situation lately.  I don't know why but when people see or hear that I have five kids under the age of 9 they start to give me all sorts of praise. At that point I feel the need to explain, they aren't all mine.  But really at this point right now they are all "mine."  I know I don't share biology with any of them, and the adopted two are definitely MINE but the three fosters are "mine" right now too.  It's only been two months that they have lived in my home but I can honestly say I love them.  It isn't a fake love where I'm just saying it, it's a real love.  The kind of love a mother feels for her children, the ones God has entrusted to her care.  When the littles first arrived I didn't sing them bedtime prayers (the ending is always 'I love you.")  Interestingly enough my husband did.  I felt like I couldn't sing our bedtime ritual unless I meant it.  I tucked them in and wished them a good night, even game them kisses, but didn't say "I love you."  I guess I take those three little words seriously.  When you think about it there are only a few people you say that to on a daily basis.  I know God has gifted me with the kind of heart that loves easily but I waited to say those words until I meant it.  Mr. M came first, how could he not. It's so easy to love a baby.  He's Innocent and sweet, a good baby the majority of the time.  He smiles when I talk to him and seems to settle when I hold him.  What's not to love about a baby.  With Batman and Peanut it took me longer. They have a strong attachment to their parents and Batman doesn't even call me mom.  They are prone to crying and tantrums and their behaviors are harder.  But Peanut calls me 'Mommy" and when I hold her now she puts her head on my shoulder.  She prefers me over anyone else and asks for me when I'm not there.  When she wakes up crying in the middle of the night she asks for me and at this point I'm the only one who can calm her. She wants me to hold her and comes to me when she is upset. I'll admit she has won my heart over.  Her beautiful brown eyes and soft spoken words could melt an iceberg.  Batman came into our home ready for love.  He longs to be cuddled and begs to be held.  At four years old, and with two littler ones in my care, it's not always easy to pick him up when he asks.  He gets mad often and expresses his disdain for what he thinks you have done wrong.  He is quick to anger and often melts down at the simplest things, but in the end he has won my heart too.  I can cuddle him and make him smile.  When I leave the house he cries and even if I've only been gone for a short time he runs up to me and tells me how much he misses me.  He still needs so much assurance and love even at four and especially because he is away form the only mom and dad he has ever known.  Each of these kids over a two month period have found their way deep into my heart.  I know they will return at some point to their mom and dad but right now I am the Mommy. So I guess I shouldn't feel the need to explain our situation. I am a mommy to five kids and yes it's a lot.  Loving on a child and giving them all that they need isn't easy day in and day out but it's what I feel called to do.  Love doesn't always come easy but I find that it does come, even when they aren't "yours."